Since Meems is on vacation in the mountains and I couldn't quite fit in her suitcase as a stowaway, I'm writing an extra post this week in her absence. (Yes, you're invited to my pity party; your invitation is in the mail.)
Time for transparency. Not because I like it (not in myself anyway; other people can be transparent all they want and that's just fine with me). I'm going to be transparent because it's good for me. And if you know something I don't and have discovered that transparency is in fact NOT good for me, please don't tell me. The time for that has passed. Better to just leave me believing that I will be benefited by sharing what I've written today.
Okay, enough procrastination. The truth about me is this: I'm an undercover candle snuffer. Never heard of it? That's because we're a secretive bunch. We hide in shadows and wait for the most opportune moment to strike. And we always do our business in a way that leaves no trace of what has really taken place. At least that's the goal.
In other words, I struggle with jealousy. Not the kind that rages or the kind you can identify by the ginormous green-eyed monster in the room. I'm the kind that tries to belittle another person's success. I don't do large amounts of belittling because that would be too obvious and might bring attention to my problem. I simply tear down people and/or their accomplishments just enough to make myself appear better than I am...or at least better than So-and-so.
If there was a professional job for this sort of behavior, I think it would be called "candle snuffer." Since my life experience thus far more than qualifies me for a management position in this field (and since I don't want the general public to know about my career), I've given myself the added distinction of being an Undercover Candle Snuffer.
Don't get me wrong. I'm not proud of it. In fact, I'm slowly learning that snuffing out someone else's candle doesn't make mine glow any brighter.
Time for transparency. Not because I like it (not in myself anyway; other people can be transparent all they want and that's just fine with me). I'm going to be transparent because it's good for me. And if you know something I don't and have discovered that transparency is in fact NOT good for me, please don't tell me. The time for that has passed. Better to just leave me believing that I will be benefited by sharing what I've written today.
Okay, enough procrastination. The truth about me is this: I'm an undercover candle snuffer. Never heard of it? That's because we're a secretive bunch. We hide in shadows and wait for the most opportune moment to strike. And we always do our business in a way that leaves no trace of what has really taken place. At least that's the goal.
In other words, I struggle with jealousy. Not the kind that rages or the kind you can identify by the ginormous green-eyed monster in the room. I'm the kind that tries to belittle another person's success. I don't do large amounts of belittling because that would be too obvious and might bring attention to my problem. I simply tear down people and/or their accomplishments just enough to make myself appear better than I am...or at least better than So-and-so.
If there was a professional job for this sort of behavior, I think it would be called "candle snuffer." Since my life experience thus far more than qualifies me for a management position in this field (and since I don't want the general public to know about my career), I've given myself the added distinction of being an Undercover Candle Snuffer.
Don't get me wrong. I'm not proud of it. In fact, I'm slowly learning that snuffing out someone else's candle doesn't make mine glow any brighter.
